What God Removed, God Replace

It was unexpected when it happened to me. I did not know whether I am ready for this. Many of you who had read the last postings left the guessing to me while some are right about it.

I bumped into him when I went to the toilet and called to him. And we said hello exchanging our greetings. And I could remembered his name. He's one of my student studying in my college.

He asked for my email address and added me on FB. We chatted and we became friends. We know each other little by little as day goes by until we went out for our first date after 2 weeks.

I knew he was interested in me but I couldn't reciprocate his love as I was recovering from my last relationship.

He was the one who heals my heart through God's love and I see his passion and love for the Father above. He encourages me to read the bible when I was going through the period. It's because of his passionate love for God, I fell for him. Praise the Lord, that he's a strong believer in God!

It's been 3 months now since we have been dating and his future plans includes me. I'm happy and praise the Lord for bringing him into my life. And we have been falling in love with each other every day.

Ps. And yes, STP. Your guessed was right, wedding bells are coming soon.

Pss. My love is such a blessing from God.

Walk Away...

I want a love, I want a fire to feel the burn, my desires I want a man by my sides, not a boy who runs and hides
Are you gonna fight for me, die for me, live and breathe for me?
Do you care? Cause if you don't then just leave!
I'm looking for attention not another question
Should you stay or should you go?
Well, if you don't have the answer, why are still standing here?
Hey, hey, hey. just walk away

I decided to walk away from my relationship. I haven't tell him yet as I have not heard from him since he was back from Germany.

There was not a contact from him while he was there and during his absence, it made me really think. Does he cares? Does he appreciate? Does he LOVES ME?

He text me on Sat that he wanted to meet me and I did not reply.
He should understand my ignorance for not replying. He did not, my phone keep on ringing non-stop.

I continue to receive his text till the next day. He still wanted to meet me and resolve this matter, and I decided to meet him.

I asked him whether his level of commitment on our relationship and he told me that he can't commit for now. He just wants to get cosy with me!

I gave him chance to explain himself but he's ignoring the whole matter.
I told that I'm leaving him and he said the decision is up to me.

And so I did, I left him that night.

Ps. This relationship is not worthy to save. I walked away!

How can he???

No calls from him and not even an email from him while he was in Germany. I sent him emails but there was no reply from him.

I've been struggling in this relationship, he sees as not a problem. I have to call him and even arrange to meet up each time.

I asked him his commitment level and by now he still can't give me a commitment that I wanted. Like, taking the next step, marriage. He even tells me that if I ever find another one, he's willing to let go of me.

His reasons being his work and his family issues. I thought it was real reasons, but I gave him benefits of the doubts so many times and it became excuses from him.

His going to Germany made me think twice.

Worst all, he cheated on me when I was with him. He's exploiting me and my feelings!

I wanted to leave many times but Im so afraid that I wont be able to find anyone to love me. I know that Im a fool in this, but I can't be a fool always.

Ps. How can he treats me like this?

I miss him so...

My heart ache for him every single minute and every day. It's been a week now since I saw him. I miss his voice, his face, his kisses, miss HIM. And everyday I'm leaving my handphone switch on just in case he calls.

My boyfriend is now in Germany on a job training for 3 weeks. He will be back end of this month.

Gosh, I just want every single day to pass quickly so that the day of meeting him will come near soon.

Ps. Absence does make my heart grow fonder.

His Family Matters

His family matters.

My boyfriend is back in his hometown to settle some of his family issues. What sort of family issue again? After all, he was back 3 weeks ago.

His brother could not support his family as well his mom. His brother's wedding decoration business have not been doing well. His brother gave up 2 well paid jobs in a managerial position to start up this business. Which end up sadly to say, not good.

My boyfriend is easing his brother's burden by giving cash allowances to his mom.

Another brother of his has an estrange relationship with his wife. There was none affair involves, is just that they are living their own lives.

At this junction, he doesn't want to be committed in marriage to me as he doesn't want to drag me into his family matters.

Ps. Still enjoying my singlehood while I can.

Wet Dream and Tears

It was a harmless intention of seeking his attention, resulting in an emotional drama.

I text my boyfriend, telling him I've done something guilty to him and during the time, he was driving to dinner with his buddies. I told him that it can wait till the next day to tell him but he was anxious.

He text me whether I was intimate with another guy. No, I will never do that! I call, he couldn't answer as he was driving, so there were lots of texting going on. Short calls and missed calls.

I replied that I was having wet dream with a huge guy and he was quiet. I knew he was angry. For the next 2 hours, I was upset of myself thinking that he couldn't accept what had been said.

Sudden burst of emotions came over me and tears started to whelm up, I then text him. He replied asking me not to cry and he wants me. He calls and uncontrollably, I cried.

In a calm voice, he told me that he's not angry with me. It's just he couldn't replied me, he was busy having a scrumptious dinner with his buddies.

After hearing from him, my emotions cool down. Everything is well now.

The sudden burst of crying is to blame on my crazy hormones, I was having my period then.

Ps. Men do stay away from women when comes to the time of the month, don't they?

I waited and was patience...

It pays to be patience and I waited for a week! Even though my fingers are itchy being wanting to call or text my bf again, I held on.

And tonight, I've received a text message from him; "Hi honey, how are you?" I replied that I'm find and misses him.

I've learned to cool down in this type of situation in order for him to have an anxiety feeling.

I'm so happy! He replies and that's all that matters.

Ps. I've learned how to be not taken advantage with. Guys, many thanks too for your advices.

Tell Tale Sign

I text my boyfriend that I will call him on Tuesday nite, 9,15pm and when I called him, it went to voicemail. He did not return my call, did not replied my text messages and emails.

Of late, it hard for me to contact him. I presumed he was tired and needed rest after work, but he didn't even have the courtesy to replied me.

I have this gut feeling that something is very wrong. Maybe, he's seeing someone else.

I'm no expert when comes to my relationship problem, so I gathered some information on the net. I even talked to my guy friend on his opinion.

Yeap, he's definitely ignoring and pushing me away. I was in denial and gave him benefit of the doubts that nothing was wrong.

It's been a year with him and many times, he hinted that he might married someone else. His family is trying to arrange a marriage for him, oh no! He spoke to his family about me and they are keeping mum about me.

I talked about our marriage but each time, he just kept quiet. I just want to spent the rest of my life with him, if he can't and won't commit, I don't see any future in us.

I'm giving my ignorance to him for this few days. I will see whether he contacts me and we just need to talk about it.

I must have the willpower not to contact him. It's gonna be hard as I still love him.

Ps. Should I give him a second chance if his explanation are valid enough?

Oops, He Did It Again...

Eeeehh, I'm very geram with my boyfriend for the last few days. He went missing again. Managed to speak to him last Tuesday and for next few days, he did not answer my call, I assumed he was fast asleep.

It got me so mad that I sent him an email reprimanded him. Thank God for email! He knew I was angry with him and he told me he was at St. Anne's feast and misses me.

Yesterday and today, I called him at about the same time, I'm so geram again. His phone to voicemail and I sent him another email. This is the one way I'm able to reach him.

I've known of his behaviour so well I'm so tired of him.

Ps. I'm only venturing my frustrations here. I've learnt that I have to accept all his bad behaviour and habits as well.

Pss. Geram=damn frustrations.

Couldn't Be Reached....

I was trying to reach my boyfriend on his cell phone last two days but it failed. It went to voicemail. Thought he switches off his cell and went to sleep. And, this morning I tried, it went to voicemail too.

I even sent text messages to him, usually he will reply, but this time, he did not. I was worried and negative thoughts came to me.

"Did he meet with an accident?"

"Is he sick and was hospitalised?"

"Is he kidnapped?"

"Is he dead?"

He was supposed to go on a work trip to German soon, but how could he did not inform me?

Luckily, I have his office number. I called and wanted to ask his colleague about his whereabouts but no one picks up the phone. Talking about desperate measure here.

The last resort is I have to ask his best friend, if I cannot locate his whereabouts.

Finally, I sent an email to him asking if he's alright and his whereabouts. His reply was his cell phone screen was totally down and couldn't see all the calls and messages received and outgoing.

I don't like his attitude on this, feels that his responsibility to tell me.

Well, at least, he could have inform me first, least I have to worry and less stress.

Ps. Do you think that he needs to tell me that his cell phone was spoilt?

What advice would you give?

My colleague is having relationship problem with her husband and many times she's comtempleting leaving her husband.

She's been married for nine years and she bored 2 children. Her husband was having numerous affair and have mounting debts to pay. As a filial wife, she forgave her husband of the affairs and even helped him to pay off his debts. Until today, her husband is still asking her for money!

There is one incident she could hardly believed what her husband had done. Her husband was secretly using her name as a guarantor to secure a bank loan. She was so upset when the bank calls for confirmation.

Today, she suspects her husband is starting yet another new affair. Many times, she has asked divorce from her husband but she's thinking about her children.

And today, she asked me this; "What would you do if you were me? Will you leave your husband?"

Ps. What advice would you give her?

Feud of In Laws

Human relationship is the hardest to comprehend especially when one stays with them.

My boyfriend's family is having some crisis. His younger sister, right now is staying with his uncle's family. She's not married, before this she was staying with her brother's family for many years now.

During this time, there were many rows between her and her sister-in-law. Which made her moved away and stayed with her uncle's family. My boyfriend is telling me her sister is doing all the household chores since she has been staying with the uncle's family. She's not happy and she's moving in to stay with my boyfriend soon.

My sister's friend is one independent girl. She has a great career and a loving husband, which she thought so. She recently married her boyfriend of 4 years. She's staying with her mother-in-law and with her brother-in-law and his family. One big happy family.

She's trying so hard to be a good daughter-in-law and sister-in-law. She's trying to please her new family, but it's hard. Her husband is the eldest and being the eldest she has to listen to his mom. Her husband comes from a very traditional family background.

As far as I know, she's not happy with her marriage life right now.

Thank the Lord, my boyfriend is not staying with his mom. Hopefully, I will stay with him when I'm married, wouldn't want to get caught in the in-law feuds.

Ps. Why is it so hard to please our in laws?

Men Stray...Women At Losing End?

My colleague asked me to drop off her at a bus stop as her husband is not picking her up today. She suddenly blurted out that she suspects her husband is having an affair.

I asked her why did she thinks so? She told me that for weeks on certain days, her husband is at an army camp, supposedly. She suspects her husband is at the other woman's house. Her husband is serving in an army camp.

She can't ask her husband's friends about his whereabouts as his friends are known to cover his tracks.

When comes to relationship, women are gifted to have sixth sense. They can sense whether their partner is telling lies.

Mostly women are on the losing ends when they found out their partners are having affair. They are not willing to leave the partners worse if it involves children. Hoping, their partner will change to a better man.

Some women just accept the fact that their husbands is having affair, much to a point that they accept the mistress into the family.

It's not fair that these women are being treated this way. Some just can't or won't get out of their trapped marriages. Most believed that because of the love and relationship they had built with their husbands, they can't forgo the relationship.

I understand why all these women can't or won't leave their marriages. It depends on every situation. It's easier said than done.

If my husband were to have an affair, I'm willing to forgive him for the first time. If he continues, I'm adamant of leaving him.

Ps. Will you leave your partner if you partner have an affair?

My X Comes A Calling...

I've received instant messages for my ex telling me that he wanted to come over to see me. He's coming back from America. I replied telling him that I'm seeing someone now and please don't come and see me.

He replied that he's just taking me as his good friend. I then told my boyfriend and he was cool about it, he did not stop me for seeing my ex.

The last I heard from my ex was 6 months ago. The reason I asked for the breakup is that he just shut me out completely and also because of the long distance. Thought it will work out, but it did not. Many times, he was leaving me messages on my Skype and Wayn instant messages, I just ignored him. I don't want to do with him anymore.

My ex is a nice guy. Even though, technology and phone calls bring us together, there were missing pieces. When I need him, he couldn't be there physically. I'm missing all the dating stuff any normal couple will do. The dates only I have had with is him is through the webcam.

Today afternoon, he called me. We talked for an hour or so, we talked on our lives since we were apart. He's coming back on the March 17th and he wants to see me. I've got a feeling that he's seeking for a reconciliation in which he denies.

I'm still contemplating whether to see him because I don't want to give him any false hope.

When he ends the conversation today, he told me that he loves me?!

Ps. What is he trying to tell me? Loving me as his friend or is he seeking for a reconciliation?

Keeping My Mouth Shut

One thing that I learnt in my relationship with my bf is shut my mouth up. No, we are not arguing or anything like that! Things are smooth as we are open and honest, especially when it comes to finances.

Our date mainly comprises on cheap hawker food and movies, or even sometimes lepaking at home with his dvds to watch. Nothing fancy restaurants yet....

Last nite, before he came and went out for a dinner, he text me and asked me to belanja him. I agreed and I presumed, he's really short of cash!

He came and we went for dinner at a hawker centre. I did not bring up the matter of me paying for the dinner, but he spilled the beans. Yeap, lately he has financial constraints and are waiting for monies which his friends owed him from a business deal.

I really want to thank him for his sincerity and love even though he has to spent on petrol, bridge and toll charges to come over to meet me.

It's best keeping my mouth shut at the right time.

Ps. When was the time you kept your mouth shut over certain issues and letting your partner deal with it momentarily?

Internet Love

She's 17, sweet and young and he's 18. Both of them are in love and they met over the internet. She stays in Malaysia while he stays in UK. Thousand of miles apart.

They have been chatting over the net, probarbly calling each other and sending emails many months now. And they decided to meet. But wait, they can't as their parents did not know about their relationship.

The girl is willing to leave everything, even her family just to be with her boyfriend. Oh, the wonder of love! The boy decide to buy an air ticket for her to go over to UK.

The girl family came to knew about her disappreance and they are trying to locate her through a help of a Malaysian residing in UK.

This is not a make up story as it has been reported in the local news.

Good news is she was located 3 months thereafter and now both of them are willing to meet her parents.

We have come to an age for internet dating, no doubt. Like it or not, millions of lonely people are looking for someone special out there. There are some genuiene ones looking and they really end up marrying, but yet there are some perverts who cheats in money or sex.

If one of your child, especially your daughter or you meet someone from the net,

a) Will you allow your child/you to condone this relationship?

b) Are you able to trust this new friend?

Ps. I met my bf thro the internet and currently we are in love and dating!

I'm In Love Again...

The daily text messages, daily phone calls, hands held, hugs and kisses came rushing by. The feelings of being in love. Feeling of being wanted, care and love by someone. Yeap, I'm in love again.

I've met my new boyfriend 3 weeks in a dating website. And thank God that he's from Penang and not somewhere far, far away. So far, we been out for 3 dates and everytime we went out, it's a great time spent together.

At this point, I've nothing much to say, as we are still new in this relationship.

Ps. I'm glad that I've put my previous relationship away. Looking forward in my new found love.

Relationship Blues

I'm having a relationship blue, and don't know what to do. Been having a long distance relationship for a year plus now and it's really hard.

The distance it's really killing me. Feel like giving up sometimes but yet need to preserver on, after all it's been a year plus now. I couldn't expect him to come and see me whenever I needed him because of his job commitment and the distance and neither could I.

Even though, we have been communicating through web cam, it's a big difference talking and seeing each other face to face. But then again I can't be so selfish, can't I?

When in a relationship, I can't think only on my needs but I need to understand and fufill his needs too. Love is not selfish, right?

It will be a long journey for us in this relationship. There are so many things that we need to build our lives together on.

Right now, I've got to accept and learn how to handle this relationship well thinking above my needs.

Do learn how to love and appreciate the people near you, that's what I've learned.

PS. Been feeling down since yesterday and a big thanks for listening to my thoughts. Please leave some good advice and comments just to cheer me up!

In A Trapped Relationship?

I met one of my friend last week and we have a cuppa just to catch up with old times. And I was asking her about some of our friends whom I lost contact with. Apparently, we did not stay in contact.

She was telling me about one of our friend, *Stella. It seems that Stella is in a very complicated relationship. Stella divorced her husband 6 years ago (this I knew), leaving the husband took custody of her daughter.

She is involved with a divorcee who has a teenage son. Her boyfriend's teenage son can't and won't accept Stella. Marriage won't happen eventually as her boyfriend is apprehensive, commitment phobia and torn between his two love ones.
Even her own daughter is not accepting her boyfriend.

I asked my friend, why did Stella is still in this relationship? Knowing that this relationship will have no future?

My friend has advised Stella but Stella is adamant of not leaving this relationship.

Will you walk away from this relationship if you are Stella?

Ps. Something to chew on for this weekend....
*Name has been changed to protect the identity of this person.

Love Matters

I was watching a dvd titled "Love Matters", a Singaporean film produced by Jack Neo with strings of actors from Malaysia.

Part of this story, it's about a normal family man married for 20 years with an 18 year old son. Bo Seng loves the wife, Jia Li, but each time he wants to have sex, the wife just turn him away. He lamented that the last time he had sex was the last 3years! He was so patient with his wife, even though his wife refused to make love to him. Come to think of it, he could have an outside affair to fulfill his full, but he did not.

Come Valentine's Day and he bought a black G-string for his wife and she refuses to wear. His motive is to have sex with his wife during this special occasion. His wife then went for a shower and he barges in and tried to have sex in the bathroom. Wow, talking about keeping his craving for the last 3 years! She barges out and he tries to have sex but she refuses him again. Ending, Bo Seng celebrate his own Valentine.

Jia Li was with her usual gossip group of housewives and of course their topic was man indeed. They were discussing that the husband blamed them when they refuse sex to their husbands. According to one belief, men have 5000 times of sex throughout their lifetime!

Thinking of what her friends had mentioned, the wife was afraid that her time of sex with her husband was up. She thought her husband has utilised the 5000 times, lol. I was laughing hard....

She succeeded seducing her husband and they had sex a few times, not knowingly her husband was having erectile dysfunction. Their sex session were a disaster!

They got into an argument and in the revenge they decided to look for paid sex session to prove their so called sexual abilities. Of course, paid session nearly took place which ended up did not.

At one point, Jia Li was asking her husband, "U men are all the same. When you ask for sex, you only think for yourself. Can you just love me without the sex?"

This above usually happen to married couples, sad to say. Because of their extra responsibilities of house chores, daily work and even children, sex between married couples tend to slow down. Sex is a physical act and plays an important part in each and every married couples, it must be mutual, understanding and love. Sex and love always goes hand in hand.

Ps. What would happen if one of partner decided to give up sex? Can we still continue to love the person without the sex itself?!